Grammar School

And the Brits have the nerve to say that the Americans and Canadians can’t spell:

sleep tight


NAJB: Month 5 In Review

It was the best of months… it was the worst of months…

Overall, I think we can say that Month 5 was our most successful to date. Though it started out and ended on very sour notes. Or rather the notes of your screams when you realise the person you want to put you to bed, isn’t the one doing it.

You started the month being babysat by your Nan and Granddad, and what looked like it was going to be a smooth night apparently went to pot 20 minutes after we’d left the house. You exercised your lungs, determination and charm as you let them know you were not taking this babysitting lying down, however you are too cute to get mad at so don’t give up on me just yet.

All I can say is that they are very patient people.

Perhaps in line with your mood and my parenting skills, the weather also fluctuated greatly this month. We started off with lovely sunshine and took advantage of it by going to London where you were absolutely amazing beyond my wildest dreams. Other than that little bit in the restaurant where you wanted to sleep, but I had to be holding you so my lunch went stone cold, and as soon as your daddy was done his and was going to take over you fell asleep.


This also month also marked the milestone of If It Can Fit In My Mouth And Even If It Can’t Really .. It’s Going In My Mouth.

Chickin Lickin

Toys, clothes, electronics, books, body parts and even plastic bags if you can manage to grab one. Mostly, you love FOOD going in your mouth. So much so that we’ve taken to having to trick you when it is meal time. The food portion of the meal has to stay out of the room that you are having your bottle in until it is done because you squirm and wriggle in an effort to look over our arms, shoulders, the sofa, the highchair, etc. in order to find the food that awaits you at the end.


That being said, you are an AMAZING eater so far. Okay, so you went off of avocado as soon as you went on it, but I haven’t given up there!! You seem more into your “stodge” (don’t know the spelling as it is a word I’ve only learnt since moving over here) like sweet potato and squash or peas, potatoes and carrots mixed. And of course mango. Mango and banana. You could alternate those two for every meal if I’d allow it!

It’s good that you’re eating though because you need the energy as we’ve got our Gymboree membership now and the half hour constant play wears you out. It’s too bad they don’t have that class nightly at about 6pm, so we could avoid the pre-sleep struggle.


That is one this that I am struggling to understand. You hate going to bed at night. Hate hate hate it. Even when you’re exhausted you don’t want to go. Yet you wake up in the morning all Mr. Happy, have your bottle and a quick play with daddy and then you cuddle up to me and fall back asleep… for two hours. Those two hours would be SO much better if you got them at night. Trust me, I know what I am talking about because I need those two hours too!

Though we cannot really complain. Yes, you still wake in the night, though not for feeds or to be changed, but because you’ve dropped your soother. We’re working on this though. At least now you will roll yourself back over if you end up on your back, so it has cut down your waking incidents. And as frustrated as we are that you’ve become a true sleep burglar, it is hard to be upset when we walk into your room to find you on your back smiling like a complete maniac back up at us.

Wakey Wakey

The smiles are not just part of your waking routine either. You seem to find the world a funnier place these days and you love to flirt with everyone when we’re out of the house. Inside the house you blow hot and cold. You can start to cry and it is a laugh within seconds or you will be smiling and talking and then just cry. I’ve not worked that part out yet. I’m not even close, but so long as there are smiles it can’t be all that bad right?

Along with the increase in smiles, you laugh… a lot. You even laugh at yourself. I wish I knew what you were saying, but I know that you find yourself funny and you actually are funny when you do something and then look at us with that Aren’t I The Funniest Person? expression on your face! Yes, you are the funniest… most of the time. Definitely funnier than your daddy. Not so sure if you’re funnier than me. That may seem mean, but I’m still struggling with losing the Boss position within the household, so cut me some slack.

Tongue Tied

This month also marked a full month without a visit to the doctor, though you have now been to the dentist and you were a superstar. I swear, if you acted at home as you do in public, I’d be putting you into The Best Baby Of The Year competition. Well wait, most of the time when you are in public. Though I guess your nan and granddad’s house and Luca’s house aren’t really public.

That’s right… as you started the month exercising your lungs, you ended it that way. Though to be fair, I didn’t witness most of it at your grandparents’ as it was when I’d gone out with the girls. So I’ll let you off and take the blame for that one. Plus, you were pretty happy the rest of the time!!

In the Yard

I cannot really complain about this month. It is hard when you hear about every other baby sleeping through the night and seeming to be perfect little angels, but you never really know what happens behind closed doors and although I do still doubt my possession of a maternal instinct and my ability to raise you the best way and right way, you seem to be doing alright. And you seem to love me still, even though I make you go to sleep at night, I take you shopping, I won’t share all of my food with you, I ..on the very rare occasion… go out and leave you with other family members and all of the other horrible things I do.

5 monthday

I’m still working on being a better mommy and learning to enjoy all parts of it, even the difficult ones, and I have to thank you for doing the little things which make it easier. At the end of this month you’ve started to lay your head on my shoulder out of the blue and just sit there for a few moments before you want to go off and bounce all over the place again.

If that alone was the only thing you’d started to do this month, it would have made all of the tears, nights of broken sleep, confusion and frustration over lack of ability to communicate between baby and parent, and the endless times you pee on us… all worth it.

You’re starting to break me, Noha. It’s the scariest feeling I’ve ever felt, but I look forward to even more.

5 Months!

Happy Five Months, Grumpy Pumps.
Mommy Love You!


…my two front teeth…

I know what you’re thinking! And you’re right, I don’t have any teeth. Not yet anyway, but they are working their way up. Actually, in my case they are working their way down.

This morning my Mommy took me to see The Dentist. I have no idea why I haven’t been taken their sooner. It was great! The lights, the people, the toys on the tables and wall. My Mommy was a bit confused as she wasn’t expecting this reaction, but she was pleased.

Once I got into the room where the dentist was, I smiled at the dentist and her assistant. I let them know that I wasn’t afraid of them. Though I didn’t like it much when they put my Mommy in the chair and reclined it so far back that I couldn’t see her face. But once they took me out of the stroller and had me stand on her while they poked about her mouth, I was back to being Mr. Toothless Grin.

And then, it was my turn. The denist put on some gloves and stuck her fingers in my mouth and was getting me to open wide take a peek. She saw my bottom front teeth but said they will be a little while longer. She could see them best from the back of my gums and showed my Mommy. Then they checked out my top teeth and the dentist said she could actually see and feel the outline of those.

I can’t wait. I’ve been told that it is not going to be a fun process and from seeing Luca, what I’ve been told is true. However, a little suffering will be worth it when I can bite down on food. No more of this only gumming my food. Oooh yeah. Life is good.

There was a downside though. I don’t get to go back for another 6 months. How is that fair? My Mommy gets to go back on Friday and sure I get to go with her, but let’s face it. What fun is it when it will be all about her mouth.

I’m so going to cover her with spinach and peas when we get home that afternoon like I did today. I’ll show her whose mouth is more important! 🙂


Gymtastic Day!

Oh what a day!

When my Parents started getting everything in our house clean and tidy and picking up after themselves RIGHT AWAY, I knew that meant people were coming to the house. At first I was a bit nervous. I like when it is just me and my Parents because I get to be the boss. What if a new boss was coming? What if I had to do things I don’t like? Like… umm.. well I’m sure there are things I just can’t think now. Then I was worried because all I was wearing was a diaper. I got over that worry really quickly though. The thought of wearing clothes just isn’t appealing most of the time. When it is cold I don’t mind throwing something on.

Anyway, I was on my Mommy’s lap and I was eagerly looking out the window to see who would be arriving and you’ll never guess who it was!!! My friend Luca! He came along with his Parents to spend the day with us. I was so excited I couldn’t stop smiling. Even when Luca decided to pull a “Calleigh” on me and suck my fingers. Even when he tried to steal the bib off of my neck. Sure, I’m bigger, but I know who the boss is when Luca’s around… and it’s not me. But I don’t mind because he’s got silly parents and they make me laugh. Plus, it is nice to have another person my size… well sort of.. around.

The Boys

The boys again

Now, there was one strange thing. I couldn’t stop smiling. Something I haven’t done for a while. I mean I smile, but I’ve been a super grump. But today I was smiling more than Luca. And he’s always the happy one. But he’s got teeth on the move and he wasn’t happy about that. So, I knew just the thing to cheer him up … a spin in my Jumperoo!!!

Luca Jumperooing

It so worked. That thing will bring a smile to anyone’s face!!

After we played a bit, my Parents made me get dressed, and Luca got changed and we headed off to Gymboree!!! Once again there weren’t a lot of people. Actually, we were the only ones. It was great. We had all of the playmats, slides, wedges, monkey bars, and Gymbos to ourselves!!!

First we hung out with little Gymbo on that rolly polly half ball thing that I am not a fan of:
Gymbo and The Boys

Then we moved on to the big wedge that I rolled down when my Daddy first came with me to Gymboree. But we didn’t roll this time. Instead our Parents thought it would be nice to try and get us to crawl uphill. Yeah right.
Luca on the go

Noah swims uphill
I did my best to try and swim up it. It was as fruitful as their attempt to get me crawling.

After that we moved all over. My Mommy sat me on this GIANT ball and wobbled me about:
Noah on the big ball

Then I made a new friend in The Nipple Ball. It was a teething baby’s dream!!!!
Noah and the nipples

Knowing how Luca was feeling with the teeth, I invited him for a nibble!
Noah, Luca and the nipples

Then Luca’s Daddy blew bubbles all over the place. I was trying to take a nap but couldn’t help watching them, and Luca chilled out on another wedge taking in the display..
Bubble Boy

Luca’s Daddy seemed to like playing with everything there, because the next thing you know, he’s playing with a pop-up Gymbo all by himself:
Ricc and Gymbo

As I continued to look on, Luca and his Mummy made some music together with some jingley bells:
Noah and Sally

When we got home, my Daddy and Luca’s Daddy went outside and cooked some food… which they did not share with me. Other than an already eaten corn cob that they tried to pass to me. How rude. But Luca and I were so well behaved. We sat there and …okay.. Luca sat there in my highchair and played by himself and looked out the window and I jump jump jumped about in the Jumperoo. It was great.

But the day took its toll on me and as I was standing on my Daddy’s lap I decided that I was tired and just put my head down and fell asleep.
Noah and Daddy

It was a much needed sleep, but it meant I didn’t get to say goodbye to Luca properly and tell him how much fun I had! They can come back anytime!!!

After I woke up, I had my dinner and then it was time for bed… just after I had a shower and showed my Daddy that I’d only been tricking them this whole time by never sticking my tongue out. But I was deliriously happy that day and couldn’t hold back any longer…

The Tongue

What a good day it was…


Grumpy Old Man (and Woman)

When did we become 75?

Every street has one. That house where you know if you step foot on the lawn, whether purposefully to get to your friend’s house quicker .. or completely by accident when you were using the curb as a balance beam, that from out of nowhere the occupant of that house is going to appear to tell you to “get off my lawn!!”. Usually it is an older, retired person or couple. The parents on the street try and sympathise in the beginning, but after being told countless times how rude or badly brought up their child(ren) is/are, they too begin to lose patience.

Lee and I are that couple.

In fact, it is midnight and Lee has just hopped into the car in search of the loud music that is thumping somewhere in our neighbourhood and preventing us from having a restful sleep. Or any sleep. When we finds out where it is coming from, he will return home and we will decide whether to lodge a complaint directly (if this is coming from a business) or if we should call the police to register a noise complaint.

That’s right, we’re old, we’re tired and we’re crotchety. If you don’t like it, too bad.

I always grew up saying that I was never going to be like my parents. Instead of focusing on how I’d rather be, I’ve ended up becoming that neighbour .. or my Dad. After all, he is the man that demanded that they turn the music down one evening when we were having dinner… in a pub.


How Swede It Is

First, my Mommy fed me whenever I wanted. Sometimes she even tried to have a nap because I was hungry a lot. Then, she gave me what I now know to be a bottle which was wonderful! It had a different flavour of milk and it meant that my Daddy could feed me too.

But as nice as those methods were, there was something lacking. I used to watch my Mommy, Kadie and my Daddy eating. My Mommy and Kadie would say that they wanted to give me real food and I thought for a moment that they could actually hear my thoughts. I wanted real food. Why was it that these big people could have something that I couldn’t? Aren’t I a baby? Aren’t I supposed to be the one who gets spoilt and gets to have all the good treats?

But days and weeks and even months went by. Nothing. Just the milk. Sometimes I would drink it down so quickly just to spit it up because I wanted them to think that I was allergic and needed something else… something… chewable. No dice.

As you know, they finally gave in. I started to get to try new things. And I still am. But now I’m not so weary. Nope, in fact I LOVE IT. Food is FANTASTIC! It’s the best thing that has ever happened to me. Other than discovering the SKY Remote and the Jumperoo. Oh and when my Daddy gets sick and stays home from work.. well, he might not like being sick, but I like having him here. He even got to feed me in my highchair the other day when I was having lunch. He’s never done that before and well, I was SO EXCITED by it all. REALLY EXCITED. So excited that I kept laughing and smiling when he was feeding me. It’s something that I’ve kept up since. All of my meals that involve a spoon see me with my arms spread out, smiling and giggling away.

The Joy of Food from Kirsty B on Vimeo.

Does life get any sweeter than this?

Blueberry Surprise


Sit Up and Take Notice

Guess who is becomming a big boy? Oh that’s right, ME!

Since my last weigh in, we have discovered that I am too big to go onto those funky shopping cart attached seats. Don’t tell my Mommy this, but I don’t mind this development at all. Only the ASDA ones were soft and cushiony. That dreaded Tesco seat was like lounging on a rock with a sunburn. You having the sunburn, not the rock.

But my Mommy was in a panic when we got to Toys R Us the other day. What she had planned on buying was too big to carry around AND push my stroller.. so what was she to do? Well, she plopped me right into the Big Boy seat in the shopping cart and off we went. Silly woman thought I’d fall over. In fact, I knew to hold on and everything. But apparently I am not supposed to lean forward and suck on the metal. After a few failed attempts at putting my soother in to prevent this, she took me out of the cart and carried me whilst pushing the cart. Life is good isn’t it?

Well, when we went to Costco a few days later, I was making some “oops.. I think I’ve just gone to the toilet” noises as I was sitting in my stroller, so my Mommy plucked me out and took me to the washroom where I surprised her with nothing but an empty diaper and a lot of giggles. When we came out, I got to ride in the shopping cart!!

Attention Costco Shoppers

This time she was quick with the soother to avoid any metal suckage. I’ve got to remember the straining noise trick for future dates!!

Impressed with my balance, my Parents took me to Toys R Us again when my Daddy was home sick from work. We were just killing time and ratting out shoplifters (again!) which is getting to be my new favourite outside of the house hobby. So when we were there, my Mommy thought we should prepare me for my life of Crimefighting and got me to ride a rocking Police thing. My Daddy thought I’d fall over so stood close by with his hands ready, but I didn’t need his help…

Woop woop it's the sound of the beast

Well, at least I didn’t think I did. But when I bent over to suck on the handle bars, apparently my Parents decided that I’d had enough.

Party Poopers. They’re lucky I didn’t make citizens arrests!!


!!Swimming Update!!

It’s official. After leaving the house early this morning, my Mommy went to the pool (without me!!!!!) and sat on a cold floor waiting to sign me up for swimming lessons while my Daddy and I had a nap at home. That’s right, I’m starting swimming lessons. I will be a whole 6 months when I start and I think for now I will not learn much more than I already know, but we’ll see anyway. At least if I don’t learn anything new there will potentially be some hot chicks in bathing suits for me to smile and drool at.

Plus, I just love swimming. I got to go two times last week. That’s right TWO times. TWO days in a row!! It was great. And once again I only got cranky when it was taking SO long for my Mommy (the first time) and my Daddy (actually both of them the second time) to get ready.

My Mommy is trying to get a bit braver with sneaking photos of me too!! Though she only managed to get me in the changeroom BEFORE we went in the pool.

Ready for the water!

Look at that excitement. It’s too bad you can’t see how much I love it in the pool too. Mommy told me that if the weather would warm up she’d blow up my pool and put it out back so I can get my swim on. Just the mention of it gets me quite excited.

Hey Lady! Let's Go!

Here I am last Friday wondering why she (my Mommy) gets me all dressed and ready to go and THEN pulls out the camera and asks me to smile and say cheese.

A) I can’t talk, Lady.

B) Do you know how cruel it is to get a little dude all excited to go swimming and then torture him with waiting so you can get a blog worthy photo? Don’t think I won’t report you to the NSPCC!

She’s okay really. Just sllllooowwwwww. But she’s taking me swimming every week for 14 weeks!! So I think I’ll keep her around for now.


Down The Toilet

As a sickly Lee and a not himself Noah lay sleeping in our bed, I took the opportunity to arm myself with cleaning products and get to scrubbing the washroom. I sat cross legged in front of the toilet and as I scrubbed I thought to myself how great my life is. Not perfect, but great. And it’s really not that far from perfect: if I had my Dad back and airfare was cheaper so I could visit my family more often.. oh and we didn’t live in Milton Keynes, it could well be considered perfect.

Sure, I may cry a lot and still be completely overwhelmed with this motherhood thing. But I have the most amazing husband who loves me despite the fact that I am… well, me.. and I have a baby boy who is generally very healthy and happy and love love loves me to no end. It can get a bit exhausting and it is not easy when it comes to bedtime and he refuses for anyone else to dare settle him. But when he was only a few days and a few weeks old, I wished for the time where he’d be able to show me that he loved me back.. if in fact he did. So I can’t really complain now when he wails because he wants Mommy.

Who would have thought even five years ago that I would be living in England, in the same house as someone else, someone who actually decided they wanted to spend the rest of their life with me, and raising an amazing little boy who somehow grew to be the size of a toddler before making his appearance.

I’m happy scrubbing the toilet when I know I’ve got these two here with me. I’m happy doing the laundry and sweeping the floor. I’m happy to be steaming veg and making purees that will end up on me, the sofa, the floor, the highchair, the Bumbo and every piece of clothing that Noah owns. Sometimes I’ve just got to take time out and look at my reflection in the sparkling toilet to realise it.


Baby Got Back

Watch Out J-Lo, I’m Coming After The Crown!!!

Noah's Got Back

Only 4.5 months old but I’ve got 6 inch Pythons (my biceps.. silly people) and Buns of Steel! When I get to St.Kitts in January, I’ll be picking Uncle Scotty up and throwing him into the pool!!