Today we made our third IKEA outing in a week.  I’m starting to think that hearing us say all of the product names may turn BoB into a bilingual baby.  Infant Swedish is a hot thing these days.  BoB actually seems to like IKEA because he (or she) starts to wriggle every time we are there.  Not the mad baby in a mosh pit movements I get when I am trying to fall asleep, but nice little wriggles that seem to say “it’s nice here”.  Either that or he or (she) knows the smell of IKEA means soft serve ice cream cones!  And who wouldn’t get excited about 35 p cones of dairy goodness?! (or 65p if you opt for a sugar cone).  I know I do.  In fact I almost wish that I measured the window wrong again and we had to go back to IKEA tomorrow to exchange them.   I’ll have to think of something else.  The “this rug is small, maybe we should buy a second one” excuse didn’t go over too well, and even though the lamp shade doesn’t fit snuggly, apparently the bit we need to correct that is found at Homebase, which is a good store too, but it doesn’t have soft serve ice cream.

We’ve continued work on the nursery (my bum pain went away) and changed the door from left opening to right opening, only to realise that the light switch is on the left side of the door.  Now I’ve got to figure a way to work around that. BoB might be able to handle the dark, but I’m not certain that I won’t wipe out as I try and tip toe into a pitch black room.  We’ll think of something whether we put in a nightlight for me or try and fix a lamp somewhere in there that is easier to get to.  In the meantime we’ll be hanging up the blind and curtains, ordering the glider and then just chilling out awaiting BoB’s arrival (at least in regards to the nursery. I still have the same million other things to do!).

Speaking of BoB’s arrival, I am debating on whether I think this baby is coming early or late.  Deep inside I still think late, but I’ve been trying to convince myself that BoB will be early so when I am caught off guard I am semi-prepared.  If that doesn’t make sense to you, it’s alright… a lot of what I think would only make sense to me and a goldfish.   Right now Lee is guessing early – a girl – and bang on 8lbs.  I’m still going with boy even though Nicole Richie has thrown my by having a girl, and I am still going with at least 9lbs.  Three people at work are convinced I am housing a 6lb baby.  Does this look like the house of a 6 lb baby!?

BoB’s house at 34weeks 4 days:

(please mind the ashy elbows)

The Huckabee (or right) wing of the house…

The Right Wing

A close-up look at the Hillary (or left) Wing

The Hillary Wing

And finally the Alanis One Hand In The Pocket Wing

The left side 34w4d

There’s got to be more than 6 pounds of BoB in there!

Lee and I have had the most productive weekend that we’ve had in months. We’ve gone DIY mad, hit up a lot of shops to help complete the preparation for BoB’s arrival, took down the Christmas tree, did laundry and built BoB’s swing.

We are exhausted.  Exhausted but happy to have accomplished enough to be able to relax a little bit.  Sure, there is a lot more to go, but should BoB appear out of the blue any day, we’ll be alright.

Today we bought all of BoB’s bathing essentials, grooming accessories, snot remover (or nasal aspirator), medicine soother thing, towels, bottle steriliser.  We also checked off a lot of items required for The Dreaded Hospital Bag.  We think we may have gone a bit overboard on the Bridget Jones underwear, but at least they have provided some amusement.   We also bought blinds and curtains for the nursery, a little stand to hold the monitor and house some of the toys (the clothes will still have to remain in the spare room ..other than a few things we can put in baskets on the “dresser”), and picture frames for the nursery walls which will now await photos being taken by our very own commissioned photographer – my mother.

Of course, not everything could go smoothly. After all, I am involved in this process.  After taking down the Christmas tree and setting up the swing (I wish I could fit in it!) I decided to unpack the sterliser to have a look.  I put it all together and then asked Lee if he could see the plug anywhere.  After scratching our heads and double checking the instructions to make sure that the ELECTRIC steam steriliser came with a plug, we realised… we were scammed again.   There was no plug in the box.   Now Lee is going to return it tomorrow and hopefully there will be another steamer …that has a plug!

So far the items we’ve bought or had purchased for us that were used or missing something are:

1) Set of 3 sleepers from Mothercare: supposedly in “Newborn: up to 10lbs”, yet one out of the three was “Tiny Baby: up to 7.5lbs”.

2) Sleep positioner from Toys R Us (Canada): When I opened it I noticed that there was a hair but tried to rationalise that perhaps the person who packed it lost a hair on it.  Then my aunt noticed it looked used.  When switched for another it was also apparent that the new ones are completely white..not “cream”.

3) Tommee Tippee Electric Steam Sterliser from Mothercare: No PLUG!

Plus, we almost purchased a cheapy pack of ASDA underwear for the hospital before I realised that someone had stolen ONE of the pairs in the pack.  Who the hell steals one pair of underwear!? And if you’re going to steal ONE pair of underwear, why did you go for the cheap ones?!!??!

There was some good news though.  Our neighbour was chatting with us when we got home and told me that I don’t look all that big for someone that is due next month.  Awesome.  Sure, he doesn’t really interact with pregnant women and he may well be on painkillers for a broken foot, but I’ll take it where I can get it these days!

And now I cannot stop wondering how there can be a single pair of underwear.  It is one item… argh.  I think I need some sleep.

Somehow, there are only 52 days left until BoB’s estimated date of arrival. Many other prepared parents would be sitting back relaxing on the sofa with their feet up, enjoying their last days of freedom. Lee and I …. are not prepared. Sure, we are getting there slowly. Slowly. Very slowly. By the end of this weekend we may even have the dark and light blue walls of the Room Formerly Known as The Geek Room covered with white paint in order to prepare it for whatever colour is coming next.

Throughout this pregnancy I’ve felt like we’ve had all the time in the world, even though time has flown by. On the days where I was constantly on the verge of vomiting, it didn’t really feel like time was moving at all, but then I’d wake up the next day and realise there was one less day for us to get things done in.

One thing we have accomplished, is that we’ve packed BoB’s bag for the hospital. So should this Womb Raver make an early entrance, he or she will have diapers and clothes at the ready. My hospital bag… umm, not quite there. I could be using this time now to do it, but instead I am sat here with earphones on, hooked up to the Crappy Listening Device I suckered us into buying all those months ago and Lee is building the “dresser” (more like below waist level shelves) in BoB’s room so we can have a better image of the colour of the wood as we cannot find anything that matches it and need to see what other colours go.

Do not get me wrong, it is not like we’ve just been lounging about. BoB most definitely has not. In the past few weeks he or she has really picked up the pace on the movement. Sometimes when it is least desired by his or her extremely exhausted mommy-to-be, and always at the utmost amusement of his or her daddy-to-be. The Almost 3 Brotherstons of Milton Keynes (only Temporarily we hope!!! Bring on anywhere else that isn’t here!) have actually been across the pond and celebrated “Christmas” with my family, endured a snowstorm and my aunts threw me a baby shower. Then we came back here, returned to work for a few days and celebrated Christmas with Lee’s family, returned to work for a couple of days (at least attempted to before my episode yesterday) and now we’re exhausted with a million things left to do.

Being 30 weeks pregnant on a plane was somewhat worrying as I was dreading having to ask for a seatbelt extension or simply fitting in the seat.  Luckily BoB hasn’t made me grow sideways and rested comfortably above the seatbelt, so all fears there were for nought.  I had been told that my sister-in-law had just flown to Toronto, slightly less pregnant (a whole 19 days), and found it uncomfortable so I was worried about that too.  However, BoB was a born traveller.  I guess already having been tossed about on planes to Toronto, San Francisco, Las Vegas and back in the early days let him/her know what sort of thing they’d be putting up with by taking residence in my tummy.  The only thing BoB decided to do was to make my belly lopsided bycurling up on my right side which seems to be his/her preferred place.

30w1d: BoB on a plane

…We interrupt this programme for an important news update…

Lee’s just completed the “dresser” and it is a nicer colour than I remember and matches the Banana Dream colour we’d thought of going with. It is so so so confusing. Cream or Banana Dream? They both go and now we are confused. Happy, but confused!!! Where is Martha Stewart…. or my mother… when we need her? Oh yeah, my mother is somewhere in a plane over the Caribbean Sea at the moment *grumble grumble*

The Dresser and the Monkey

Back to your Original Programming.

So, as this has become a lot longer than planned, we’ll do a mini round up in photos.

December 12th we arrived in Toronto to see snow on the ground (YAY!!!!!!!)

12.12.07 Snow!

Even the excitement of the fluffy white stuff couldn’t distract me from what I really wanted though…


30w1d: BoB gets Wing Machine

The next day Lee, my Mom and I braved the snow for some last minute shopping.  My jacket couldn’t do up, but who needs a jacket when you’ve swallowed a personal heater!?

30w2d: BoB keeps me warm

(p.s: my hair didn’t look that good after trudging across the parking lots of Woodbridge in the snow)

The next day saw Lee off to work at Oceanfresh and my Mom and I off pyjama shopping and eating West Indian food in the car like the true Ghetto Queens that we are.   When we set off for the day, my mom forgot to inform me that Lee was wearing the same top as I was.  This was the SECOND time we’ve been caught matching unaware.

30w3d: BoB in stripes

30w3d: BoB from the front

14.12.07 Happily Matching

On the 15th of December it was time for the Barlekushnaphan Christmas.  This involves food, drink, six children 8 and under, a party room, presents and tears.  Though this year being Lee’s first was actually tame. No food or drink was thrown, no one wet their pants (regardless of age), no major adult tantrums were thrown and no one dropped the gloves when it came time to the adult gift exchange.  It was like everyone behaved for Lee.  Where was he our whole life?!

It was smiles all around that day.  At least once the party started.

30w4d: Hot Pink Santa with Kiera and Sarah

Perhaps too smiley on some occassions…

Aaron and Lee

The following day was my baby shower than my aunts held for me.  Like every other big occassion in my life, Mother Nature was royally pissed that she hadn’t received an invite and decided to chuck the snow down.  It was the highest one day snowfall in 60 years, but that wasn’t keeping my mom, BoB and I away from Pickering. No Siree!! We got ready early and made our way slowly but safely.  The only times it got really scary were on the way there when I kept thinking I had to go to the washroom and there was no where to go.  But I held it in like a big girl and we made it.   What an effort they went to as well!! I had been nervous because Cath kept telling me that it was going to be the gayest shower ever, but Sue and Cath could not have held a more perfect shower for me.  There was jerk chicken, macaroni pie, rice and peas, cake, presents and lots of laughter.  I am not sure how I will ever be able to let them know how grateful I was for the day!  It may not have been the turn out that they were expecting, but I had a GREAT time!  As did Luke when he returned and found his new love Pennie sat in his living room.

I have no photos of the shower (my Mom has those I think), but here is me getting ready to go.

30w5d: Shower Bound

30w5d: BoB in Silver!

The next day everyone was relaxed.  Cath came by with the boys for one last pre-BoB visit and the afternoon saw Lee back working at Oceanfresh and then a chilled dinner with the parents and back home to pack.

This is how chilled the day was…just take a look at Adam lounging:

30w6d: Hanging out in the kitchen

The trip came and went in a flash, but it was the taste of home I’d been needing for a while and should keep me going until my mommy arrives (hopefully) in time for BoB’s arrival!

Since we’ve been back Christmas has come and gone.  We had a nice quiet Christmas in front of the Wii with Lee’s family.  We’ve found out that Russell had a heavier brain than the rest of us, but I shall keep working on it.  It might actually help me regain all of the brain cells I’ve lost over the past 32.5 weeks.

One thing has remained.  My inability to stay in one outfit as demonstrated on Christmas Day….

The Morning:

32w: Christmas Day

32w: Christmas Day II

The Afternoon:

32s: Festivus!

The night:

32w: Christmas Day III

So there we have it.  A quick  long drawn out bring-you-back-up-to-speed update on how things are going in the life of Kirsty, Lee and BoB.

I think I need a nap now.  And then I will really start working on the nursery.  I swear.  Really.  Well, probably.

Until I sat down to write this, I hadn’t realised that we had spent time every day (or night) of this weekend doing “baby stuff”.  On Friday night we hit up Toys R Us for a Tommy Tippee Nappy Wrapper (or as Lee prefers to call it, the Poo Sausage Machine) and a Summer Infant Prenatal Heart Listening Device (or as I like to call it Heart Attack with Headphones).

The Poo Sausage Machine still sits in its box where it shall remain until this nursery gets done…or started… or BoB’s born – whichever comes first.  However, we were SO excited to listen to the heartbeat.  Something that we… rather I…. had thought would calm me down.  I had been warned not to get one because it can cause a great deal of stress when you get no heartbeat.  That person should be listened to.  I wanted to throw this thing at the wall a couple of times because I knew that there beat a heart somewhere in there, but this thing refused to find it.  Sure we heard hiccups  and a kick here and there, but in my mind it was all gas because feet cannot function without a heart right?!  So just as I was about to take a sledgehammer (had I had one handy) to this crap piece of plastic, Lee decided we would turn it off and he placed his hand on my stomach when low and behold… BoB decided to kick his so hard it was visible.

Just another example of my child already playing mind games with me.  Little does he or she know that I am keeping score here.

We’ve now put it away somewhere so that I cannot find it, strap it on and convince myself that BoB’s escaped or that all of this activity in my expanding belly is just the universe play a mad mad trick on me and it is just the motherload of gas.

I’m better not be turning into Teenwolf for some Cosmic practical joke!

Right.. on to Saturday (we’ll skip the bit where we tried for the heart again and I swear we could only hear mine… )! We headed out for the booming metropolis that is Bedford, to visit this baby stuff store that I had found online and that stocks the crib (aka cot-bed) and highchair that we want.  They did have the crib in (though in a box) and it was way cheaper than anywhere else, however she wasn’t sure if it was sold to anyone else so they said they’d call me on Monday to let me know. Fair enough.   I then asked about this highchair. I’d seen it online and wanted to see it in person.  She took us up to the store room, past the sign that said Please Do Not Go Upstairs – Staff Only, and there it was… in a box.  There it remained … in a box.

So we left empty handed, and after realising that the people of Bedford are scarier than the one in Milton Keynes, we headed back home.  Taking an alternative Tour of the Crap Estate of the MK on the way.  People are right, they were crap.  I felt like I lived in Laguna Beach by the time we got home.  Perhaps it was the lack of Stella cans on our driveway or the presence of all of our windows.

Today we headed out to The Baby Show in London (right across from our old stomping ground of West Brompton tube station, Mom!).  I was hoping to score a lot of freebies and see what was out there that I had no clue about.  Oh, and see if anyone had that highchair… not in a box.  At first I was overwhelmed. So much to see, so many scam draws to enter, so many bags of useless flyers to collect and SO many big bellied women.

It was weird.  Weird, but worth it.

We found a tiny stall with a cute little stuffed monkey and Che Guevara baby gros which we loved.  We got the monkey – 25% off!  Then we made our way through the larger nursery supply stores looking for the cot-bed and highchair.  It looked like we were going to go home with nothing but a monkey and free nipple soothing cream, until I saw it standing there.  Right by the weird Mork and Mindy egg shaped highchairs, and sat in amongst the $459 strollers… the red leatherette beckoning me.

BoB's Food Throne

No, that’s not BoB.  Just focus on the chair.

So yes, it folds, it has rear wheels (even though the photo has front and back), the tray is big enough for a plate and cup (I am paying attention, Cath!), it folds in half(ish) to store away, the seat is wipeable without many places for the food to disappear, it reclines, the height is adjustable, it has a funky placemat toy thing and most of all I LOVE IT! And even better,  we OWN it! Poor Lee had to lug it all the way back to the car – thanks to the collections place being closed an hour and a half before the event was over, and us not knowing you could drop it off earlier.

I make so many spur of the moment decisions, that when we walked away and I saw the Fisher-Price Healthy Care Highchair, I started to panic.  But when we got closer I hated the material it was made out of and Lee pronounced that he preferred the  one we’d just purchased.  I took the opportunity to exhale and throw away most of the doubt.  Then we walked around and Lee said how much he now disliked the Stokke style highchairs and I felt a little better, and then we went to collect the highchair and some lady said “We have that highchair at home. It is amazing. My little boy LOVES it.  It is worth the price”.  Hallelujah! I made a correct decision.  Universe 3429324 – Me 1!!!!!!  Actually Me – 2 (marrying Lee was kind of smart too)

So other than the highchair we picked up a couple of Tommee Tippee bottles on sale along with a baby monitor.  A slow closing toilet seat (okay, you had to know we’d get something not normal) and lots of free samples of laundry detergent, breast pads and two hats that are too big for a newborn, but might come in handy in case we need to protect BoB’s baldy head from the bright Milton Keynes sunshine a few months down the line.

We also booked our 4D scan (I was completely against this in the start, but certain events and people have brought me around and convinced me of the good that will come of it) which we got a great discount on.  And we’ve booked it so that we will be able to show BoB off in Canada when we head over there in December.  They even gave us an extra week in between in case BoB didn’t behave the first time – I informed them that there are already some behavioural issues that we are working on.

So all in all a busy weekend, but a productive one.  And… I only cried on the Sunday.  One out of three ain’t bad!  Oh wait, I lie, I think I cried on Saturday too. Crap, well Meatloaf still thinks two out of three ain’t bad.  Just this once, I’ll have to agree with Mr. Meat Loaf.

I swore to myself at the beginning of this roller coaster ride that I would not be one of “those” women who didn’t enjoy every moment of being pregnant and couldn’t wait for it to be over.    I must have crossed my fingers without realising it because as opposed to how the days seemed to be flying by in the early weeks, they are dragging already.  I’m not even halfway there yet.  Everyone at work seems to be going on holidays to lovely, sunny, not Milton Keynes type places … meanwhile I look forward to the end of the day where I can put on pyjamas and ‘enjoy’ my nausea in the comfort of my bed.  That’s when I can get comfortable.

“They” say that pregnant women should lie on their side (preferably left), but “they” forgot to tell BOB, because BOB hates it.  I swear every single time I lie on my side the little dude pinches me or something as evil, because it does not feel nice at all.  Then again, it could be because every now and then to make sure that I am not imagining the belly, I attempt to lie on my stomach which feels really and I mean really strange.  And no doubt is quite uncomfy for the little one.

Speaking of The Belly – how is it that at 17.5 weeks pregnant, I look like I’m waaaaaay further along.  How come I’ve got this Salma Hayek sudden eruption of baby belly, without the benefit of looking like Salma Hayek (minus that short and surely pregnancy caused frizzy hair she had there for a while)?!  Though I really don’t need the Boob Explosion that she has going on.  Not cool.  Lee may disagree, but carrying them around normally would be a pain, never mind them and BOB.

I digress…  back to BOB.  When I told my mother about my last midwife appointment and how she said BOB was so well behaved and that the ultrasound photo was so nice, she responded with “what do you expect coming from.. Lee”.  Well, I’ll have her… and anyone else reading… know, that BOB takes after me too!  Today I got some money out that I was going to exchange and as I counted it, the tiniest feet in the world started making sure that I knew they were there.  I put the money away and the feet went away.  Later on at the dentist I went to pay and when I got the money out again, the feet came out again.  I think the second time it was in protest at being separated from the money.  Awww.. like mommy like BOB.

So there it is.  The past ten days have seen BOB start kicking … though it feels more like he or she is fluttering their uber long eyelashes (from Lee!) against my insides… and the return of the choking nausea feeling, my first purchase of maternity jeans (which make me feel really weird) and the first time we have purchased something specifically for BOB  – a lovely happyfaced skull and crossbones number courtesy of Lee’s Taste.

Other than that, not much action.  Still struggling to make it through the day and addicted to Take on the Takeaway and Hell’s Kitchen.   BOB is so going to be a foodie.

I think I’ve just jinxed myself.

Update time! Only …. 157 days 18 hours 47 minutes left!!

No, not Nelly, BOB.

That’s right, BOB’s got her (or his) first set of wheels.   Many thanks to Lee’s wonderful parents for kitting BOB out in the softest and coolest stroller.  Sure sure, there is a lot of time before BOB’s first ride, but we’re ready for it!  In fact, not only does BOB have wheels, but also a teddy bear soft snowsuit to make the Three Roundabout ride home from the hospital (that is assuming that I stay with MK General for some unknown reason).

Now all BOB needs is a blinged out baby bottle/pimp cup and we’re rocking.

Oh, and somewhere to sleep.  And maybe a couple of diapers.  But, time is on our side and hopefully I’ll hit the 16 week mark and find I’ve got this elusive energy that everyone promises me I am going to have once again.

We’ll see.

For now though, this Baby Momma is just happy to know that BOB’s got a ride home from the hospital.

Check it out:

BOB's Whips